Tuesday – He Hears Voices, And They Like Me

[ninanevermore]

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After our falling out this last Thanksgiving, I don't think I'll miss talking to my kid brother as much as I will miss the voices in his head. I liked them, because sometimes they told him to buy me presents. I'm sure they were just trying to buy me off and make me stop referring to them as "The Voices in My Kid Brother's Head" and start referring to them as his "Spirit Guides" the way he does. I can't be bribed that easily. However, I'm just shameless enough to accept any attempted bribes with a sweet smile and a "Thank you," while feeling no obligation to return a favor I didn't ask for in the first place.

To say my kid brother is strange is an understatement. It's not the kind of strange you can see across the room; in fact, he looks pretty normal. He doesn't have to dress all in black or get his face tattooed like a leopard or go out his way to draw attention to himself. My brother is organically strange, the kind of strange that can only happen in nature. The Voices in His Head are not schizophrenic voices that he actually hears. They are his heart's desires and personal opinions elevated to make them sound more impressive than anyone else's desires or opinions, and are only one facet of his intrinsic oddness. He "feels" something is so, and says his Spirit Guides have sent him a message. He gets mad when I call his Spirit Guides "Voices."

Though I'm no longer speaking to my brother, I still have affection for him and I still wear the jewelry the Voices told him to buy for me. He frequents swap meets, flea markets and yard sales, where he picks up things for himself and that the Voices tell him certain other people will like. Often, they are right. The Voices often have better taste than my brother does, and sometimes more common sense.

My plan for communicating with my brother involves a combination of text messages, exaggerated facial expression, charades and – if all else fails – conveying a message to a person I am still on speaking terms with to deliver to my brother (this will be even easier if my brother is in earshot, which will allow the messenger to simply jerk a thumb in my direction and say, "What she said.").

I wish there were a way to talk to the voices in his head directly without him hearing. I have a very important message for them: I really like the silver necklace with the garnet-encrusted cross you told my brother to buy me a few years back. Matching earrings would be nice, if he happens to come across any. Keep in mind, Voices, that I don't promise I'll start speaking to him again if he buys them. The most I will commit to is that I might give you Voices a title that shows more respect. I think "The Shopping Guides in My Kid Brother's Head" has a nice ring to it, don't you?



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Comments

[simplecity2htwn.livejournal.com]

Being an only child, I've always found it fascinating how siblings can fight and not speak to each other for prolonged amounts of time. Will this silence stay in place until he apologizes or is there a specified time period?

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

I figure until he apologizes or one of us drops dead, which ever comes first. I haven't thought about it much, since it never occurred to me that he might apologize.

I'm kind of stuck. I made a big show of telling people I wouldn't speak to him any more, which put me in a bind after I calmed down. He is kind of exasperating to speak with (most prison guards are), so the conversations are not really a big loss.

See, I'm learning........

[simplecity2htwn.livejournal.com]

I made a big show of telling people I wouldn't speak to him any more, which put me in a bind after I calmed down.

This is Texan for "....but I'll be damned if I'm the one to make the peace first".

Re: See, I'm learning........

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

Damn. You're good.

In my opinion, what you want to do is write a book about how to translate Texan for non-native speakers. Not a joke a book (that's been done to death), but an honest-to-goodness guide to our idioms and what they mean.

I'm not saying it would be a best-seller, but plenty of naturalized Texans would find it handy.

[martina-d.livejournal.com]

My husband hasn't spoken to his mom (aside from pleasantries at a wedding, and having to take her to the hospital once) in three years. It has been THE BEST three years of my life. Hands down. Of course, she doesn't have Voices. She's just Evil.

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

Sadly, the net effects of Evil and Crazy are often indistinguishable.

[jenandbronze.livejournal.com]

My mother is close to her mother, for now, but after hearing the damage she has done to my mother, I haven't forgiven her, although she sents me checks for christmas and birthday, I will never understand some of the things she has said or done to my own mother, whom I love with all my heart.

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

It's been said that we love people in spite of, not because of. This puts us in the awkward position of loving people we don't always like.

Some people are just screwed up, and some of these screwed up people are often relatives. *hugs*

[jenandbronze.livejournal.com]

Correct, and my mother's mom, we believe has mental problems, but won't confess she does, and just does a lot of weird things, sadly.

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

Neurotics always know they are neurotic, which is why they are quirky but not crazy. The thing about crazy people is that they think they are normal and everyone else is nuts.

[woohag.livejournal.com]

OMG I love this post so much. :)

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[jessnhalinda.livejournal.com]

Hmm, my older younger brother (younger than me, older than my younger younger brother) has schizophrenic-tendencies--at least, he told me that he tested positive for them--and he also buys excellent presents.

Of course, I'm not a jewelry kind of girl, so every year he gives me either Pepsi or AA batteries, two things of which I am always in dire need.

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

That is just about the sweetest thing I've ever read. :)

[drippedonpaper.livejournal.com]

It's hard to love the crazy. They drive us mad but somehow we can never erradicate them from our hearts.

::hugs::

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

I can tolerate the crazy so long as I don't have to spend too much time in the same room with it. From a distance (preferably at least 30 miles), it can be entertaining. *hugs*

[basketcaselady.livejournal.com]

Your brother might be my sister & brother's missing triplet. Some day we shall compare notes. But just the thought of discussing their dysfunctionality makes me need a margarita--maybe 2 or 5.

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

Make mine (all 5 of them) doubles.

[jenelycam.livejournal.com]

Wow. You have a very interesting family. Or a very interesting kid brother at least. :P At least his Voices are nice to you.

*HUGS*

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

I can tolerate almost anyone willing to give me presents. ;D

It's only when the Voices start giving me advice on how to live my life that they get on my nerves. *hugs back*

It's that Scots-Irish blood.

[noblwish.livejournal.com]

You do know that whole Voices thang kinda runs in the family -- usually through the females, though. Has Ron claimed to name any of the voices? I used to think some of our cousins and aunts were either crazy or secretly In League With The Devil (tm) when they talked about seeing dead people in their dreams and hearing their voices... and then I saw Papaw in a dream and Clay right there in the car and Daddy hasn't shutup since he died and, well... I guess I'm bonkers, too -- or else everyone's right about my husband's true incarnation. :D

Re: It's that Scots-Irish blood.

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty sure Ron's are BS. While he occasionally claims to contact a ghost or spirit (or one contacts him), his "guides" are just a way of giving weight to something he pulled out of thin air.

Not that I like discussing this in this public of a forum (I don't lock these, remember), but Ron's thing is different than the postmortem communications the rest of us participate in. His are too deliberate, too predictable, to be real. The real thing? They happen when you least expect them, or maybe when you really need them and the dead reach out to you. Generally, we don't share these experiences with people outside the family (like Ron does) because they are 1) likely to get you committed and 2) very personal. He'd a fake.

But I like the jewelry.

[sidneymintz.livejournal.com]

You're hilarious :)

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

Nah, I just like jewelry. ;D