Monday - The Nightgown
Jan. 22nd, 2007 02:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ninanevermoreToday on my drive into work, I was thinking about my favorite blue nightgown with pictures of little snowflakes all over it, and the sarcastic comment that my husband made about it last week.
This nightgown is a few sizes too big on me and it is made out of the same dimpled fabric used to make long underwear. I confess that there is no mistaking it for something purchased from Frederick's of Hollywood. It could further be said that this nightgown has all the allure and sex appeal of a burlap sack. Still, it is very warm and comfortable, and I can pull the extra long sleeves over my hands to double as oven mitts when I take my bowl of oatmeal out of the microwave at breakfast time.
For these reasons, I felt defensive about it the morning that my husband looked me up and down and said, "Wow, honey. That gown, those shoes - talk about sexy!"
He had to bring the shoes into, as well. They are little blue sneakers with the backs cut out. They are, like the gown, very comfortable. Also like the gown, I don't wear them outside of the house.
"It's winter," I pointed out, "If I were wearing a lace teddy right now, I'd freeze to death." The microwave oven beeped to let me know that breakfast was ready. I pulled the sleeves over my palms and carefully pulled my bowl out and set it on the counter. "And these sleeves are awesome. Find me a lace teddy with oven-mitt sleeves and I'll wear it every night."
Jeff sighed. "You are such a mom these days."
"Please," I said as I looked at him in his ratty terrycloth bathrobe, "Like you're dressed any sexier than I am."
I looked down at the gown and pulled the front of it out in front of me. I tried to remember if I was pregnant when I bought the gown, or if I just grabbed the wrong size. I think it was the latter, since this is a winter garment and I was never large and pregnant in the wintertime. I picked up the gown at a sporting-goods store; it is a sleeping garment for women who go camping and snooze in the great outdoors. Admittedly, it is for a woman who goes camping and also happens to be very, very large. Still, it usually doesn't matter what I wear to bed; because of Jeff's work schedule, I sleep alone. The only reason he was even in the kitchen to make fun of my sleepwear was because he was up past his bedtime.
"Look, there's room for a couple more people in this thing. I could have a party in here. This gown could be very naughty, if you think about it."
"If you say so, honey."
I picked up my cereal bowl. "And did I mention the oven-mitt sleeves?"
"You did."
I decided to strike a compromise. "It's winter. It's cold out. When the weather warms up, I'll try to sleep in something cuter. Until then, leave me and my nightgown-built-for-three alone."
I sat my bowl down on the table and pushed the sleeves back up my forearm. We embraced before he went off to bed.
"I guess you can wear that as long as it's cold out, but come spring I want to see some black lace," he said with a waggle of his eyebrows.
This means I'll have to start using potholders in the morning when the weather warms up. Fine. I'll be the first to tell you that marriage is all about compromise and meeting in the middle.
But if he thinks I'm getting rid of the sneakers with the backs cut out, he's got another thing coming.
* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ # ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *
This nightgown is a few sizes too big on me and it is made out of the same dimpled fabric used to make long underwear. I confess that there is no mistaking it for something purchased from Frederick's of Hollywood. It could further be said that this nightgown has all the allure and sex appeal of a burlap sack. Still, it is very warm and comfortable, and I can pull the extra long sleeves over my hands to double as oven mitts when I take my bowl of oatmeal out of the microwave at breakfast time.
For these reasons, I felt defensive about it the morning that my husband looked me up and down and said, "Wow, honey. That gown, those shoes - talk about sexy!"
He had to bring the shoes into, as well. They are little blue sneakers with the backs cut out. They are, like the gown, very comfortable. Also like the gown, I don't wear them outside of the house.
"It's winter," I pointed out, "If I were wearing a lace teddy right now, I'd freeze to death." The microwave oven beeped to let me know that breakfast was ready. I pulled the sleeves over my palms and carefully pulled my bowl out and set it on the counter. "And these sleeves are awesome. Find me a lace teddy with oven-mitt sleeves and I'll wear it every night."
Jeff sighed. "You are such a mom these days."
"Please," I said as I looked at him in his ratty terrycloth bathrobe, "Like you're dressed any sexier than I am."
I looked down at the gown and pulled the front of it out in front of me. I tried to remember if I was pregnant when I bought the gown, or if I just grabbed the wrong size. I think it was the latter, since this is a winter garment and I was never large and pregnant in the wintertime. I picked up the gown at a sporting-goods store; it is a sleeping garment for women who go camping and snooze in the great outdoors. Admittedly, it is for a woman who goes camping and also happens to be very, very large. Still, it usually doesn't matter what I wear to bed; because of Jeff's work schedule, I sleep alone. The only reason he was even in the kitchen to make fun of my sleepwear was because he was up past his bedtime.
"Look, there's room for a couple more people in this thing. I could have a party in here. This gown could be very naughty, if you think about it."
"If you say so, honey."
I picked up my cereal bowl. "And did I mention the oven-mitt sleeves?"
"You did."
I decided to strike a compromise. "It's winter. It's cold out. When the weather warms up, I'll try to sleep in something cuter. Until then, leave me and my nightgown-built-for-three alone."
I sat my bowl down on the table and pushed the sleeves back up my forearm. We embraced before he went off to bed.
"I guess you can wear that as long as it's cold out, but come spring I want to see some black lace," he said with a waggle of his eyebrows.
This means I'll have to start using potholders in the morning when the weather warms up. Fine. I'll be the first to tell you that marriage is all about compromise and meeting in the middle.
But if he thinks I'm getting rid of the sneakers with the backs cut out, he's got another thing coming.
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no subject
Date: 2007-01-22 10:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-23 05:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-23 05:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-23 05:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-23 10:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-23 10:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-23 10:31 pm (UTC)OK, in NJ (where I went to school was odd, 6th grade was it's own school) 6,7 and 8 are Junior High and 9,10,11 and 12 are High School.
I think maybe 5th grade goes to Junior High now.
no subject
Date: 2007-01-23 10:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2007-01-23 10:40 pm (UTC)