Wednesday - Little Devils

[ninanevermore]

Today on my drive into work, I was thinking that I need to hunt down the little girl named Emma who used to attend my son's former daycare center. She is apparently a vampire, or maybe a werewolf. One of those. Either way, she needs to be dealt with. Until she is, my son can never be rid of the curse she has inflicted on him. After sustaining numerous bites from that deceptively cute little monster, he is now a biting scourge himself.

It breaks a mother's heart.

I don't want anyone to worry. I'm not going after Emma with a wooden stake or a silver bullet or anything violent. I've decided that a big bucket full of holy water is my best bet. I'll dump the bucket of water on little Emma, and either she will be just fine (if I am wrong about her) or the evil that is Emma will be washed away and people will be amazed.

"Wow! Look at that! Lights started pouring from her body and then she disappeared in a puff of smoke! How ever did you know that that cute little girl was actually an evil hell spawn?" they will say.

But I will not have time to answer them. Instead, I will be running to check on my son to make sure that he no longer feels a need to sink his teeth into the flesh of his little playmates. In his defense, he feels that everyone he bites has it coming. It is a great way to get someone to drop the toy they have swiped from your hands, or to make them stop bothering you in general. When something works this good, the logical thing is to stick with it. Biting works brilliantly for him.

"I'm sure it's just a phase," his teachers tell me, "A lot of them go through this."

When other people's children bite, it's a phase. My child is supposed to be sweet and perfect. He's supposed to be the one that everyone loves best. I no longer get to feel smug when I see other people's children behaving abysmally. He's been infected with Emma's evil. I have to face the fact that my son is now a tiny vampire or a miniature werewolf, or, worst of all, perhaps he is turning into a normal toddler with all the monstrous behaviors that this implies.

Whatever the cause, the result is pure evil.

Comments

it's a phase

[erisreg.livejournal.com]

an easily cured one,.. bite them back,..with the explaination that that's how it feels,.. worked on the four who made the mistake of biting me,.. (works with pinching too),..;)

[highlandwolf.livejournal.com]

I am SO Sorry!

Your curse will be more difficult than Holy Water though, as I see more wolf than vamp in those actions. You're going to have to get a lot more traditional for the cure. Holy water doesn't work on wolves...

Uhh... personal experience you ask? Um... just trust me, OK?

[l-l-u-w-d.livejournal.com]

Honestly, yes, biting back works, but only bite them until they can feel it, not hard enough to actually leave a mark. And do it immediately after you catch him biting someone else. Worked wonders on my sister, when she bit me so hard she drew blood. My mom bit her, and to my knowledge, she never bit anyone else again. It also has worked on all of my children, as well. So, this is a tried and true method from this mother of more than one of those biting younglings.

[noblwish.livejournal.com]

Got any silver spoons lying around somewhere? Feed him with one of those and see if it burns. ;)

[mad-jamison.livejournal.com]

I like your icon. Rubber duckies rule!

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

I have a necklace that is a cross made of silver. He touches it, and he's fine. NOW what? o.O

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Don't they?

Re: it's a phase

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

He doesn't bite me, though. Or anyone big. He's cunning like that.

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

I hope you are not implying that I go after a toddler with a silver bullet...? I'm not sure I could do it. Just because no one has beaten a werewolf with holy water in a movie doesn't mean it's not worth a try.

Sometimes movies get it wrong. For example, Lon Chaney was walking around as a kind of half wolf, half man thing, whereas the guy in American Werewolf in London actually turned into a realistic-looking wolf (which is more in line with the traditional mythology). Which movie is right?

If I were to make a movie, holy water would do the trick, at least on werewolves below the age of 5. They might become immune after that and more drastic measure would have to be taken. :)

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

He never bites at home, only daycare. Usually, they say he is not the aggressor; he does it in retaliation to something the other kid did to him. When he acts like he was going to bite me, I've told him no and he stops. I've seen the marks he leaves on other kids, and I'm not sure I'm tough enough to let him to that to me so I can bite him "back." Maybe if the situation doesn't resolve itself soon...

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

No kidding; I've seen the teethmarks he leaves. :(

[highlandwolf.livejournal.com]

Well, if you want to go with movies, go with the ones that say kill the source of the virus, the rest will come back. "American Werewolf in London"? Whoever bit that little girl needs a bullet!

But I think so long as you teach the tyke not to bite, a little bit of wolf in his nature is not such a bad thing!

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

True, that. They are noble, loyal and dedicated to their friends and families (i.e., their packs). Beyond the biting, what's not to like?