Tuesday - Premonition
Jan. 3rd, 2006 12:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ninanevermoreToday on the drive into work, I decided not to look toward the Ferris Wheel and instead concentrate on the road ahead of me to set my path for the new year. The Wheel can be a distraction some times. I still have a premonition that it will stop for someone I know before too long; I had three premonitions of this in 2005, and had three family funerals to attend (I missed one, though). My premonition for the year that has just dawned is that it will bring both tears and triumph that will make the one that has pasted seem mild in comparison.
Who believes in premonitions? I do.
I was raised to believe in mystery and to embrace the unknown. I grew up in a house where ghosts were real and dreams could foretell the future, among other things. My mother believed that the universe was a mysterious place and that that it was okay to embrace that mystery and run with it. She thought God was more creative than most people give him credit for.
She used to describe the dreams that came true, and said they were different than regular dreams. She would wake up in a cold sweat and sit strait up in bed and gasp when she woke from one. The details were always as sharp as a movie, instead of hazy and dream like. They had color, sounds and smells that still lingered in the room after she was awake.
The last dream she had like this was before her last surgery. She was preparing to go in for a double mastectomy and breast reconstruction, so we would not have to worry about her cancer returning. The week before, she dreamed that she was watching the surgeon perform when he stopped and announced that something was wrong and they would have to stop. This is the point where she woke up.
When she came out of the anesthesia and learned that they had, indeed, stopped her surgery midway through the reconstruction because they found a swollen lymph node that turned out to be malignant, she said it all made sense. She wasn't afraid. "It was just like finishing my dream," she told me.
I'm glad she taught me to believe in mystery and wonder, and to seek them out. I'm not sure that I would want to live in a universe without these things.
Who believes in premonitions? I do.
I was raised to believe in mystery and to embrace the unknown. I grew up in a house where ghosts were real and dreams could foretell the future, among other things. My mother believed that the universe was a mysterious place and that that it was okay to embrace that mystery and run with it. She thought God was more creative than most people give him credit for.
She used to describe the dreams that came true, and said they were different than regular dreams. She would wake up in a cold sweat and sit strait up in bed and gasp when she woke from one. The details were always as sharp as a movie, instead of hazy and dream like. They had color, sounds and smells that still lingered in the room after she was awake.
The last dream she had like this was before her last surgery. She was preparing to go in for a double mastectomy and breast reconstruction, so we would not have to worry about her cancer returning. The week before, she dreamed that she was watching the surgeon perform when he stopped and announced that something was wrong and they would have to stop. This is the point where she woke up.
When she came out of the anesthesia and learned that they had, indeed, stopped her surgery midway through the reconstruction because they found a swollen lymph node that turned out to be malignant, she said it all made sense. She wasn't afraid. "It was just like finishing my dream," she told me.
I'm glad she taught me to believe in mystery and wonder, and to seek them out. I'm not sure that I would want to live in a universe without these things.
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no subject
Date: 2006-01-03 11:52 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-01-04 05:23 pm (UTC)The dreams she had that happened were not usually scary, just hyper-realistic. She dreamed about funerals where she could actually smell the roses on the casket (I don't ever remember smells in my dreams), and still smelled them when she woke up.
I wouldn't worry too much.