Monday – I'm Confused.

[ninanevermore]

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I read an article on the web today that says the secret to being happy is to be old, male and Republican.

With all these things going for him, why the hell is my Dad so cranky???

I guess if there weren't a glaring exception, it couldn't be a rule.


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Comments

On the other hand.........

[simplecity2htwn.livejournal.com]

Maybe your dad is happy being cranky? I'm pretty sure that's the case with my mom.

Re: On the other hand.........

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

You make a good point...

[millysdaughter.livejournal.com]

So to be happy, I need to glue on a pecker?

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

I wouldn't recommend it - glue can be a skin irritant.

I've heard (but cannot substantiate the rumor) that strap on varieties can be purchased that may make you capable of happiness. I've also heard (but also cannot substantiate the rumor) that said item will arrive in a plain brown box in the mail and your neighbors will not have any idea what you are purchasing. To avoid an embarrassing scene, do make sure the kids are not the ones signing for and opening the packages that week.

If you're afraid to take the risk, you just have to mope with the rest of us girls. ~_^

[millysdaughter.livejournal.com]

If the kidlet opens the package, I might never see it!
I am sure her friends would have a royal heyday with that idea!!!

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

You would know the moment you came home whether the package arrived and if she opened it. Her stunned horror and sudden inability to make eye contact would be a dead give away. The idea that your parents are not, quite, who you thought they were is always kind of a shock to the young.

Take her aside and explain that you only ordered it so you could learn what it means to be really, truly happy. I'm sure she'll understand. Or run screaming from the room. One of those two things, anyway.

[millysdaughter.livejournal.com]

She is a teenage girl. Therefore, her parents did NOT ever have sex, will never have sex, do not know what sex even is and never will find out.
I think "run screaming from the room" is the more likely scenario.