Friday - How to loose weight on a diet of macaroni and cheese

[ninanevermore]

Today on my drive into work, I was thinking about macaroni and cheese, which happens to be my son's new favorite food. Instinctively, he can tell that it is of questionable nutritional value, and therefore desirable in large quantities.

I made a batch of the stuff this week. My husband likes the homemade version of the dish, and once in awhile I'll cook him something nice to help him forget that I don't know where the vacuum cleaner is stored and that if I do accidentally come across where he hides it, I will pretend that I still don't know. A good relationship is about compromise; he vacuums, while I cook foods that will give him a coronary someday (while making sure he is current on his life-insurance payments).

Not thinking it could lead to problems, I gave our not-quite-two-year-old son a small serving of the macaroni and cheese with his dinner. Little did I know that for certain small boys, macaroni and cheese is like crack cocaine, and they are addicted after the first bite.

On that fateful evening, I fixed a little plate with pieces of chicken, some corn, and the crackaroni. I gave this to my tot, and then fixed a small plate for myself. When I sat down next to him, he pointed at my plate and grunted. I saw that he had not touched his chicken or his corn, but he was completely out of pasta.

"What? Look, you still have chicken and corn to eat. You don't need any more macaroni," I told him.

He pointed to my plate and grunted louder, putting on his "I'm going to cry if you don't give me what I want" face.

"Eat your chicken," I said.

He began to cry. Not wanting him to starve to death, I used my fork to push the crackaroni from my plate onto his. He began to stuff it in his mouth with both hands. To my son, pasta, like everything else, is a finger food.

I went back into the kitchen and got another serving for myself. By the time I sat down, he was out again. Once more, he pointed to my plate and grunted. I admitted defeat and handed over the goods.

It turns out for me that macaroni and cheese is a zero-calorie food, so long as I am trying to eat it in front of my son. I could fix myself platefuls of the stuff all day long and I promise I would not gain an ounce.

Jeff went looking for the container of crackaroni in the refrigerator a couple of days later and couldn't find it.

"Your son ate it all," I told him.

"All of it?"

"All of it."

"You're kidding." He looked at our skinny toddler, who weighs roughly 25 pounds and looks like we never feed him.

"I promise, I didn't eat very much of it. He wouldn't let me."

Jeff pondered for a moment. "Are you going to make some more?"

I guess I'll have to. Either that, or admit that I know that the vacuum cleaner is kept in the closet of the back room, and that I actually do know how to use it.


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Comments

[elira-wiken.livejournal.com]

*laughs* My son isn't big on the mac and cheese, but he is that way with chicken. When we go to Micky D's or some place like that I ask him what he wants for his kids meal and the answer is always the same. "CHICKEN".

[preci0us.livejournal.com]

thats so funny.

nice for your waist line tho lol

my daughter is at a phase where the stuff on my plate tastes better. we can have the exact same foods sitting in front of us, but for some reason she will only eat what is on the plate for me

[creactivity.livejournal.com]

I feel the same way, though I never thought to call it crackaroni. I have to limit myself to only making the stuff on New Year's Eve because otherwise I'd be completely out of control.

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

The only meat my son will eat is chicken. Breast meat, not dark, thank you. But not if there's any cheese on his plate.

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

Since mine is a boy, he'll probably want what's on his and my plate both. I'll be back to the size I was in high school in no time, I bet.

[elira-wiken.livejournal.com]

Yeah my son doesn't eat much hamburger, but he'll eat fish and chicken.

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

That was the most decadent recipe I've ever seen in my life. I think I gained 10 pounds just reading it. Wow. No way in hell I'm ever letting him get a taste of that stuff, I'd spend the rest of my life in the kitchen making more of it. ;D

Your recipe?

[poetlady.livejournal.com]

I am just curious:)

Maria

Re: Your recipe?

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

I'm embarrassed to say after reading hers. I'm kind of an informal cook.

I would have to call mine, "Homemade Mac & Cheese, thrown together and not fancy at all."

1) Toss some pasta in a pot of boiling, salted water. Large Elbows are a favorite in my house, but whatever you find in the pantry and have enough of to make as much as you want will work fine. Dumplings? Penne? Shells? Portions of 5 different varieties that you just have a little of each tossed together? It's all good.

2) While pasta is boiling, root around in the fridge for whatever kind of cheese you might be able to find. Velveeta is a must, but other cheeses must be found so you can say that it's homemade mac and cheese and you didn't just melt some Velveeta over some noodles. Most often I toss in Kraft deli style American (has a better flavor than regular American) and possible some of my son's cheese crumbles that have cheddar, Colby and Monterey jack in them.

3) When pasta is about half cooked, take it off the stove and dump out the water. If you're feeling fancy, you can combine the rest of the ingredients and finish cooking this in the oven at whatever temperature sounds right to you. If you aren't, or you're in a hurry, finish this on the stove top with the burner set to simmer.

4) Dump some milk in with the pasta. The whole milk that the baby drinks is best, but the 2% is okay if the baby is running short on milk. Add some water (until it looks like the right amount). Dump in some butter - Land O Lakes, if you've got it, because it's the yummiest butter there is.

5) In a small dish, mix a little milk with something to thicken this mess with. If you are going to use the oven, use flour. For the stovetop method, use corn starch because it cooks faster and won't leave the M&C with a pasty flavor if you don't cook it long enough. Mix until dish is lump-free and stir into pasta.

6) Toss in cheese: Cubes of Velveeta, torn up slices of American, cheese crumbles, and whatever else you found in the fridge that needed to be used before it turned green. Add seasoning. Morton Nature's Seasons Seasoning Blend is a must, but toss in a dash of garlic powder, onion powder, black pepper, and/or whatever variety of Mrs. Dash is on hand.

7) Stir. For oven version, remove from stovetop when it looks smooth, put in casserole dish, put cheddar on top to add fanciness, and bake until cheese is bubbly and starts to brown. For stovetop version, just keep stirring until it's thick and it tastes good to you. If it doesn't taste good, see what else you might have in the seasoning cabinet that will fix what ails it.

8) Enjoy.

Now, aren't you sorry you asked?

[m-malcontent.livejournal.com]

You know certain of the hamburger helper varieties combine...macaroni and some vaguely cheezish substance...but you get to add....GREASY GROUND MEAT!!!


Thus making it natures most perfect food.

[highlandwolf.livejournal.com]

I'm afraid my 3 kids would eat it 5 times a day if I kept that much stock on hand. Terribly Addictive!!!

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

I do a homemade version by cutting up an onion, browning the meat and putting it in the recipe posted in the comment above (only now the whole thing is made in a skillet, and the pasta is cooked at a low simmer after the meat has been browned with the onion). It is the perfect guy food. No matter how much of it I make, my guys eat every greasy, cheesy noodle's worth of it. :D

[neanahe.livejournal.com]

(*nods*) It's crack-a-roni, I'm telling you...