ninanevermore (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ninanevermore) wrote2009-10-28 02:29 pm
ninanevermore) wrote2009-10-28 02:29 pm
Entry tags:
Wednesday – Reflections On A Damned Childhood
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I went to see my friend Astro Joe perform with his friend Benny Rod at a area wine bar the week I after I got laid off. Joe and Benny met up when I used to frequent the open mike at my favorite but now defunct coffee house, and now they collaborate together as a musical act they call Rod Garcia, because while they can both sing and play various instruments, they aren't real creative when it comes to names.
AJ's sister Lucy and Benny's girlfriend Henrietta were there, and we ladies sat and cheered on the guys while the other patrons pretty much ignored them. Lucy still lives in South Texas, and was tickled pink that AJ gets so much attention from other musicians in Houston because all the guitar players want an accordion to accompany them for all the so-called "Texas Music" style acts in the Houston area. Between the country music, Tejano music, Cajun music, and music influenced by the descendants of all the German immigrants who settled the area a hundred or so years ago, there is a big demand for accordion players. Houston is urban enough, though, that no kid wants to be the dork that learns how to play accordion growing up. Where AJ grew up accordion players were not just common, they are considered kind of cool. After all, you can't have a tejano band without an accordion player.
"Back home, everyone plays accordion," she said, "He was just one in a million."
After the bar closed, Joe teased me about losing my job by using the word "damnit" in an email.
"I can't believe you lost your job, damnit!" he said with a grin. AJ doesn't generally swear, so just hearing the word from him was enough to make me laugh.
"Didn't you think to use the Aggie defense?" asked Lucy. I didn't think of it at the time, I told her. She had a good point: I did attend Texas A&M University, where "Howdy" is the official greeting and people walk around wearing T-shirts printed with the command, "Say HOWDY, Damnit!" As far as expletives go, this mashed-together combination of Damn and It doesn't even register as offensive on my radar. It probably wouldn't have registered as offensive on anyone else's radar, either, if Big Death hadn't been looking for a reason to get rid of me.
I don't blame Texas A&M for desensitizing me to the word Damn. I blame my mother.
She was a pious, church-going woman and a good person, but I don't think she lived a day in her adult life that she didn't damn something to hell. The washing machine got out of balance and began banging like a big base drum? "Oh, damn it!" The phone rang while she was mushing together the raw ingredients for meatloaf and was covered with gook up to her elbows? "Damn it! Can one of you kids get that for me?" She walked into a child's room strewn with clothes and toys? "Damn it! Look at this mess! You damn kids think I'm your maid, don't you? If you don't clean this damn room RIGHT NOW I'm going to clean it for you and put all this in a DAMN TRASH BAG!"
While I'm sure the rumor flying around my old office is that I cursed someone out in an email, but the only person I damned was me. "I messed up, damnit," I typed. I was flustered, so I used the word damn, which reminds me of my dear departed mother and makes me feel kind of warm and fuzzy inside. That's the defense I should have used, since it's true. Instead, I went with, "You're kidding! You're firing me for THAT!?"
It was all I could think of on such short notice, damnit.
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.
.
I went to see my friend Astro Joe perform with his friend Benny Rod at a area wine bar the week I after I got laid off. Joe and Benny met up when I used to frequent the open mike at my favorite but now defunct coffee house, and now they collaborate together as a musical act they call Rod Garcia, because while they can both sing and play various instruments, they aren't real creative when it comes to names.
AJ's sister Lucy and Benny's girlfriend Henrietta were there, and we ladies sat and cheered on the guys while the other patrons pretty much ignored them. Lucy still lives in South Texas, and was tickled pink that AJ gets so much attention from other musicians in Houston because all the guitar players want an accordion to accompany them for all the so-called "Texas Music" style acts in the Houston area. Between the country music, Tejano music, Cajun music, and music influenced by the descendants of all the German immigrants who settled the area a hundred or so years ago, there is a big demand for accordion players. Houston is urban enough, though, that no kid wants to be the dork that learns how to play accordion growing up. Where AJ grew up accordion players were not just common, they are considered kind of cool. After all, you can't have a tejano band without an accordion player.
"Back home, everyone plays accordion," she said, "He was just one in a million."
After the bar closed, Joe teased me about losing my job by using the word "damnit" in an email.
"I can't believe you lost your job, damnit!" he said with a grin. AJ doesn't generally swear, so just hearing the word from him was enough to make me laugh.
"Didn't you think to use the Aggie defense?" asked Lucy. I didn't think of it at the time, I told her. She had a good point: I did attend Texas A&M University, where "Howdy" is the official greeting and people walk around wearing T-shirts printed with the command, "Say HOWDY, Damnit!" As far as expletives go, this mashed-together combination of Damn and It doesn't even register as offensive on my radar. It probably wouldn't have registered as offensive on anyone else's radar, either, if Big Death hadn't been looking for a reason to get rid of me.
I don't blame Texas A&M for desensitizing me to the word Damn. I blame my mother.
She was a pious, church-going woman and a good person, but I don't think she lived a day in her adult life that she didn't damn something to hell. The washing machine got out of balance and began banging like a big base drum? "Oh, damn it!" The phone rang while she was mushing together the raw ingredients for meatloaf and was covered with gook up to her elbows? "Damn it! Can one of you kids get that for me?" She walked into a child's room strewn with clothes and toys? "Damn it! Look at this mess! You damn kids think I'm your maid, don't you? If you don't clean this damn room RIGHT NOW I'm going to clean it for you and put all this in a DAMN TRASH BAG!"
While I'm sure the rumor flying around my old office is that I cursed someone out in an email, but the only person I damned was me. "I messed up, damnit," I typed. I was flustered, so I used the word damn, which reminds me of my dear departed mother and makes me feel kind of warm and fuzzy inside. That's the defense I should have used, since it's true. Instead, I went with, "You're kidding! You're firing me for THAT!?"
It was all I could think of on such short notice, damnit.
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I have to admit, being a mom will make you WANT to use the word. I don't want my kids to be fired for cussing in email so I use "stinking" to the excess. "Can't you ever pick up those stinking toys?" "I'm so tired of this stinking kitchen."
There is something about motherhood that can inspire expletives. I admire a friend of mine who always uses sweets and candy. She will so "Oh Sugar Plum! I forgot my keys!" Or "Kit Kat, I hate it went that happens."
I do love my kids. Mommying is just so repetitive sometimes, I want to get mad at something.
Maybe I just don't have a good attitude. I love my kids but I hate housework.
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Winnie the Pooh's, "Oh, Bother!" is also nice.
Hating people is bad, but hating housework is normal and healthy. It's right up there with hating going to the dentist or getting an annual exam. It's not about attitude, it's about being honest enough to know an unpleasant task/ordeal when you see one. :)
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I take a perverse comfort in the remembering how imperfect my mother was. She was amazing in her own right, but seeing her flaws allows me to accept that I'm not perfect, either, and that's okay. :)
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