ninanevermore (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ninanevermore) wrote2008-09-02 03:12 pm
ninanevermore) wrote2008-09-02 03:12 pm
Tuesday – Dad, I'm Sorry About Destroying America. Please Don't Ground Me.
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Today on my drive into work, I was thinking about the book my father is writing. The working title is What's Destroying America, and he is putting a lot of time and effort into writing down all the things that are destroying America so that clueless Americans will realize the error of their ways. Americans such as myself.
Considering that my old man gets most of his facts from Fox News, I can guess what sort of things he is saying in his book.
When I recently visited his house, he noticed the Obama '08 stickers on my car. "Are you voting for that communist?" he asked. He repeated the question a little louder when I didn't answer right away. Considering that he and his wife babysat for me while I served as a delegate for Obama at my county Democratic convention last spring, I figured he already knew the answer. Apparently he needed verbal verification that I haven't changed my mind since then.
"Yes," I answered.
He grunted. He frowned.
"I don't know where I went wrong with you and your younger brother," he said, shaking his head, "Everyone's supposed to be a Democrat when you're in college, but you're supposed to turn into a Republican by the time you get to be your age."
"Well, I am pretty immature," I pointed out, "Everyone says so."
He grunted again.
When I visited him yesterday, I asked about the book. Not about the facts of it, though I am worried that I will be asked to read it at some point. I simply asked how it was going.
"Slow," my father said. He is almost done with the first draft, but apparently needs some reworking. Even if it didn't, the process is grueling. He really can't type very well, so he writes the book out by hand onto yellow legal pads. After this, because no one else can read his handwriting, he reads what he has written into a tape recorder for my stepmother to type into the computer. He is dedicated to finishing the project, though.
"I just want to get my thoughts down on paper before I die," my father says.
I told him that's understandable.
"I don't know why he thinks he needs to write a whole book," I told my husband when I got home, "when what he believes is destroying America can be summed up in one word. I can see it now: chapter 1, Liberals. Chapter 2, Liberals. Chapter 3, More Liberals."
"Chapter 5, Damn Liberals," Jeff added.
"Chapter 6, Liberals and their Liberal Ideas," I said. I told him about my father's lament about how I failed to mature into a Republican after I reached 30, like I was supposed to.
"Ron didn't either, though," I said, "so he failed on both of us. He can't figure out how we turned out different than the other two."
"We don't make enough money between us for it to be in our interest to vote Republican," Jeff said. "Your poor Dad; thank God he has Randy." My oldest brother, Randy, considers Rush Limbaugh a personal hero and also gets his facts from Fox News. This cheers my father up a little bit.
I'm a little nervous that at some point, my father is going to ask me to look over his book since I am considered to be the writer in the family. Because I am who I am and how I am, I would not sabotage it. I would do my best to make sure it turns out coherent and readable, no matter how much I disagree with it.
If I do this for him, I want to be thanked for all my efforts in the prologue. I don't just want to be thanked, though. I want him to say, "And special thanks to my commie liberal Democrat daughter for her help in showing the world how people like her are destroying America. Without the inspiration of her and others like her, I would never have written this book. Without her talents, no reader would ever have been able to slog through it."
Somehow, I don't think he'll argue about putting that in there. Brutal honesty is one thing my father and I happen to see eye to eye on.
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.
.
Today on my drive into work, I was thinking about the book my father is writing. The working title is What's Destroying America, and he is putting a lot of time and effort into writing down all the things that are destroying America so that clueless Americans will realize the error of their ways. Americans such as myself.
Considering that my old man gets most of his facts from Fox News, I can guess what sort of things he is saying in his book.
When I recently visited his house, he noticed the Obama '08 stickers on my car. "Are you voting for that communist?" he asked. He repeated the question a little louder when I didn't answer right away. Considering that he and his wife babysat for me while I served as a delegate for Obama at my county Democratic convention last spring, I figured he already knew the answer. Apparently he needed verbal verification that I haven't changed my mind since then.
"Yes," I answered.
He grunted. He frowned.
"I don't know where I went wrong with you and your younger brother," he said, shaking his head, "Everyone's supposed to be a Democrat when you're in college, but you're supposed to turn into a Republican by the time you get to be your age."
"Well, I am pretty immature," I pointed out, "Everyone says so."
He grunted again.
When I visited him yesterday, I asked about the book. Not about the facts of it, though I am worried that I will be asked to read it at some point. I simply asked how it was going.
"Slow," my father said. He is almost done with the first draft, but apparently needs some reworking. Even if it didn't, the process is grueling. He really can't type very well, so he writes the book out by hand onto yellow legal pads. After this, because no one else can read his handwriting, he reads what he has written into a tape recorder for my stepmother to type into the computer. He is dedicated to finishing the project, though.
"I just want to get my thoughts down on paper before I die," my father says.
I told him that's understandable.
"I don't know why he thinks he needs to write a whole book," I told my husband when I got home, "when what he believes is destroying America can be summed up in one word. I can see it now: chapter 1, Liberals. Chapter 2, Liberals. Chapter 3, More Liberals."
"Chapter 5, Damn Liberals," Jeff added.
"Chapter 6, Liberals and their Liberal Ideas," I said. I told him about my father's lament about how I failed to mature into a Republican after I reached 30, like I was supposed to.
"Ron didn't either, though," I said, "so he failed on both of us. He can't figure out how we turned out different than the other two."
"We don't make enough money between us for it to be in our interest to vote Republican," Jeff said. "Your poor Dad; thank God he has Randy." My oldest brother, Randy, considers Rush Limbaugh a personal hero and also gets his facts from Fox News. This cheers my father up a little bit.
I'm a little nervous that at some point, my father is going to ask me to look over his book since I am considered to be the writer in the family. Because I am who I am and how I am, I would not sabotage it. I would do my best to make sure it turns out coherent and readable, no matter how much I disagree with it.
If I do this for him, I want to be thanked for all my efforts in the prologue. I don't just want to be thanked, though. I want him to say, "And special thanks to my commie liberal Democrat daughter for her help in showing the world how people like her are destroying America. Without the inspiration of her and others like her, I would never have written this book. Without her talents, no reader would ever have been able to slog through it."
Somehow, I don't think he'll argue about putting that in there. Brutal honesty is one thing my father and I happen to see eye to eye on.
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*cringe*
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lulz
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Lord only knows where my dad is in the political spectrum. He's all Christian right leaning, then the next minute he's "I hate Bush and Cheney". Drives me insane. I told him the other day to stick to one side or the other, it's annoying LOL In all honesty though, I think moving out of po'dunk and into another place has really opened my parents' eyes.
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Whats weird is that Rock Ribbed Republican Texas up until about 15 years ago it was impossible to be elected here as anything BUT a Democrat. Course not all those Democrats were liberal.
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He is dedicated, isn't he? ^^
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My dad would probably write a book called "People, and How They are Destroying the Universe."
I start screaming every time Fox News comes on. I can't even watch the weather on there without having a fit.
Ann Coulter and Rush Limbaugh make my right eye twitch, so I better end this now. :-o
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